Tom's Blog


Posted by Tom Zuba on September 10, 2013 0 Comments


to be honest,
I have considered it myself,
more than once,
over these past 20+ years,

I still can’t imagine
not really
(thank God)
what it has been like for many of you,
too many of you
to enter your child’s room
to find him hanging by a rope
or the garage
and find him lying on the floor
or to receive the call
telling you she has shot herself
this time for good
or taken way too many pills
or drinks
or completed (this time) any of the countless other ways that those we love so dearly decide that what is best for all involved is for him or her to end life.  On this planet.  

and then yours.
As you knew it.

I can say
I am sorry
I am sorry
I am sorry
a thousand times 
I am sorry
and then
a thousand more times
I am sorry.
And that would not be enough.

I can not bring your beloved back to life
as much as I wish I could,
with your help,
I can bring you back to life.
I have the tools.
I have the experience.
I have the desire.

To create a place for you
right here
in this Healing Circle
where you get to feel all of it.
Every feeling
and every emotion
yearning to be seen, heard and honored.

Reminding you over and over again
that you are not your feelings.

You are so much more than
and all the other feelings and emotions surging through you.

At your very, 
you are love.

And you are lovable.

in the end 
(as in the beginning)
love is all there is.
And love heals everything.

A number of years ago
I had the privilege 
of hearing the Dalai Lama speak in Chicago.
He said, “You Americans have lost hope.  It’s why the suicide rate in your country continues to soar.  You must be find hope again.”

Let me be hope for you.
Let us be hope for you.
Until you, 
are able to be hope again,
or for the first time. 

On this day,
September 10, 2013,
World Suicide Prevention Day,
I offer you love
and hope.

Always hope.

If my NEW WAY of "doing grief" resonates with you, I'd love to work with you one-on-one. If you are in the Rockford, Illinois area we can do that in person, otherwise, I am having great success working with people all over the country via Skype or FaceTime.  Email me at if you would like to take the next step on your grief journey and we can schedule a session.


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