Tom's Blog

"Transforming the Way We Do Grief" downloadable VIDEO PROGRAM

Posted by Tom Zuba on October 18, 2012 10 Comments

After my 18-month-old daughter Erin died in 1990, like so many, I tried doing grief the old way. Frankly, I didn't know any better. So, I hurried back to work. I tried to keep busy. I did everything I could to take my mind off of "it" ~ including repressing, denying and trying to pretend away all of my feelings and emotions. What I was actually doing, in retrospect,
was creating pain on top of pain on top of unbearable pain.

 It's what we do. 
No one has ever suggested another way.  Until now!

When my wife Trici died in 1999, once again faced with the daunting task of moving through my grief, I decided to try and do grief a different way.  The old way hadn't worked for me.
What did I have to lose? 
I knew I could heal. I had done it before. 

And when my 13-year-old son Rory died in 2005, because this was my third time navigating the grief journey, I became an active participant.  
With intention and focused action I discovered a new way to do grief.

I am so happy to share all that I've learned with you.


My intention, in offering this 3-part Video Program, 
is to help you heal.

My intention is to help make the unbearable, more bearable for you.  My intention is to help you heal.  In this 3-part video program, which you will be able to upload straight to your computer and view over and over again, I share with you much of what I've learned about healing during my 20+ year journey with grief.  

I talk about:  

Grief 

The Many Expressions of Grief

Mourning 

The Difference between Grief and Mourning

The Role Mourning plays in Healing

Denial

The Gifts of Denial 

How YOU can Create a Safe, Sacred Space where your own healing can occur 

How YOU can Create your own Healing Plan

Questions and Answers Following my Presentation

I've also created a Companion e-Workbook, that you'll upload to your computer.  It includes all the definitions, slides and quotes I use in this program.  It also includes prompts and space for you to reflect on the information I present.  Finally, I assist you in creating your own Healing Plan with intention and focused action. 

To Purchase this Video Program (3 videos, over 80 minutes long, that you'll upload to your computer) and the 17-page Companion e-Workbook  Click here


"I can highly recommend this Video Program as I just started it last Sunday. Tom leads you through each video with his handbook - so effective. Since Sundays are such a depressing and sad day for me, this program has helped me get to the core of my grief. I can write out my feelings, go for a power walk along the river and reflect and remember my wonderful son. I truly believe physical activity is also a key to working though one's grief - do a prayer walk, talk to yourself, talk to your loved one, think of what you will write in your journal and then go back home and write!"

Here is an overview of the material I present in
Part 1, Part 2, Part 3 of this Video Program
and the Companion e-Workbook:
 

Part 1 (35 minutes)

Part 1 introduces you to the definitions of grief, mourning and denial that I use.  I share many of the often surprising and confusing ways that grief expresses itself.  I explain that once I decided to look at my own grief journey with this understanding of grief, mourning, and denial it became clear to me what my next step was, and my next step, and the step after that.  Using these tools, you too can become an active participant in your own grief journey.  You too, can figure out what your next step is.

A sneak peak at Part 1


Part 2 (27 minutes)

Part 2 of the program teaches you how to create a safe, sacred space; a space where YOUR healing can occur.  I also offer concrete steps you can take to create your own healing plan.  While some aspects of the grief journey are certainly unique to the individual experiencing it based on the relationships that existed prior to the death, and the actual circumstances of the death, I believe that we all have much more in common in our grief than most realize.  You only discover this truth when you are in a safe, sacred space where you can communicate from the heart with another person.  You can each create this space for yourself and for others.  You can also actively participate in your healing by consciously creating a Healing Plan with intention and focused action.  

A sneak peak at Part 2

 

Part 3 (20 minutes) 

Part 3 is the Question and Answer section following my presentation.  Questions include:

What do I do when family and friends want me to grieve differently?

What do you say when someone asks "How are you?" or "How many children do you have?"

How do I make peace with my life?

Can everyone heal?

What if my tears make someone uncomfortable?

A sneak peak at Part 3


17 page Companion e-Workbook

The Companion e-Workbook includes all the definitions, slides and quotes I use in my presentation.  It also includes prompts and space for you to reflect on the information I present. Finally, I assist you in creating your own Healing Plan with intention and focused action.  

To Purchase this Video Program (3 videos, over 80 minutes long, that you'll upload to your computer) and the 17-page Companion e-Workbook  Click here


I believe there is a NEW WAY to do grief ~ 
a new way rooted in hope that offers the promise of a new, full, joy-filled life.

You are within minutes of viewing your very own copy of "Transforming the Way We Do Grief Worldwide" and your Companion e-Workbook.

 

To Purchase this Video Program (3 videos, over 80 minutes long, that you'll upload to your computer) and the 17-page Companion e-Workbook  Click here

  

 

Comments (10 Comments)

Is there a CD version that I can purchase…it would be a powerful tool to use for review and reflection while driving.

Blessings,

Sandy Coffman

Posted by Sandy Coffman on June 30, 2017

Is there a CD version that I can purchase…it would be a powerful tool to use for review and reflection while driving.

Blessings,

Sandy Coffman

Posted by Sandy Coffman on June 30, 2017

Tom,
Is it possible to purchase your “Transforming The Way We Do Grief” program on a DVD and to get a paper version of the accompanying workbook?

Posted by Diane Hewson on April 22, 2016

Dear Tom,
I first heard about you on a podcast by a colon cancer site. My husband just passed away in September after 5 long years of fighting colon cancer. I have felt lost and alone since. Our life and love for each other was something so very special. I am having trouble grieving and I am wanting to read your new book Permission to Mourn. I have a vision impairment and it is difficult to actually read books, I was wondering if there is a way to get an audio version or if an audio version will come available?
Thank You so much
Rebecca

Posted by Rebecca Potter on April 09, 2016

I heardyou may be coming to the North jersey Area for an event which I believe is in March. Can you give me details. I lost my son on January 18, 2015 and am struggling every minute of hte day.

Thank you,

Kathleen Fitzpatrick

Posted by Kathleen Fitzpatrick on February 23, 2015

Dear Tom,

A friend of mine referred me on to your Facebook page and website recently. My fiance, Walt, died suddenly and unexpectedly right next to me on April 22, 2013 (Earth Day). We had just become engaged on Valentine’s Day that year. In this last year +, I have also struggled with some serious medical things..it is not lost on me that the physical things cropped up as I was struggling to deal with the grief in losing Walt. I look forward to perusing your site a bit more but wanted to say.. “Thank you”. With gratitude, Vickie

Posted by Vickie Baroch on July 18, 2014

I am SO glad to find your page. Our son passed away 01/01/2014. I still can’t believe that it’s real. I can’t believe that he’s gone. I find your words encouraging. THANK YOU! This is such a difficult time.

Posted by Kerry Dawson on April 24, 2014

Dear Ed ~ I’m so glad you found my website and that you find it helpful as you learn to navigate your journey following your son Jake’s death. I’d be honored if you’d share a link to my site on your blog. Thanks so much. Take good care.

Posted by Tom Zuba on March 06, 2014

I just found your blog, Tom. Our 24-year-old son Jake died two months ago. We are now on this unimaginable journey along with so many others. Thanks for creating this resource. If I may, I would like to provide a link to your website on my blog, The Infinite Fountain. (http://infinitefountain.com). I will be back to visit often. Be well.

Posted by Ed Colman on March 05, 2014

This sounds like a very interesting program! My son, Taylor was kidnapped & murdered at the age of 17 & it’s been a very traumatic journey. I come in contact with many others that have lost loved ones to violence to provide support & resources. I’ll be passing this along at our next seminar as a resource! Blessings to all who walk this path!

Posted by LaDonna Heintzelman on September 24, 2013

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