Suggestion #9 ~ Examining Your Beliefs
This is a tough one for so many of us.
Change can be difficult.
Especially, in light of the death of someone we love,
when it feels like everything has changed too, too much.
We cling to what we are familiar with.
To feel safe
in a world that feels anything but safe.
But the truth is
that we have each inhaled
inhaled
beliefs
that cause us pain.
Beliefs about life
and death
and God
and how the world works.
And we hear these beliefs repeated
over
and over
and over
again.
And we convince ourself that they are true.
They are not.
But they are painful.
If our goal is to make peace with life
we must slowly
and methodically
trace back
our feelings and emotions
to the beliefs that they are rooted in.
Because we are human
this usually doesn’t happen
until the pain we are experiencing
is so excruciatingly debilitating
that we scream
out loud or in silence
“enough is enough.”
I can’t live like this one more minute.
There must be another way.
There is.
Suggestion #9 of 10
to help you
create a New You
in this New Year.
#9 Commit to identify and question all your beliefs that are causing you pain.
Unless you want to marinate in pain. You, and only you, get to decide what you believe. It’s possible (probable) that many of your unexamined beliefs are causing you great pain. Beliefs that may include:
He shouldn’t have died.
She died too young.
I was robbed.
I could have saved him.
I will never be happy again.
Life is no longer worth living.
There will always be a hole in my heart.
Life is unfair.
Death is the enemy.
Replace these painful beliefs with life-affirming beliefs.
What is one belief
that you are holding on to
that is causing you great pain?
Are you willing to take a closer look at the belief
and ask yourself
“Is this true?”
Do I know
beyond the shadow of a doubt
that this is true?
If you’d like to explore this further, or any other facet of your grief journey, I work with people one-on-one. If you’re in the Rockford, IL area, we can do that in person. If you’re out of the local area, we can Skype or Facetime. If you'd like to work with me, please email me at tomzuba@aol.com and we can schedule a session and discuss cost.
I also want to make sure you aware of my Video Program “Transforming the Way We Do Grief.” The intention I set when I created this 3-part Video Program, is to help you heal ... to help make the unbearable, more bearable. Through this program, I share with you much of what I've learned about healing during my 20+ year journey with grief. To learn more click: "Transforming the Way We Do Grief.”